Something massively wyrd, so feel free to ignore it...

Meaning, if you have any conventional religious belief (and wish to retain it) you probably should not be reading this. Same if you're a strict materialist. As a matter of fact, if you don't have some inkling already of the weirdness that goes on quite logically in my mind, you should probably just move along, 'cause this overturns a lot of assumptions about....well, everything, really. It's really addressed to Litharriel, 'cause she missed out on the IMing that's been going on over this...anyhow, I'll be semi-discreet and you can just skip over the darkness.....

Hmm....well, have you ever read The Origin of Consciousness in the Breakdown of the Bicameral Mind by Julian Jaynes? It was published in 1976 (aka the year I was born), and proposed that the human mind used to operate in a non-integrated, non-'self-conscious' way, with the left brain receiving impulses from the right brain as hallucinations--the voice of God/gods, angels, etc....well......this has to do with when humanity started emerging out of that. I need to c&p my IM notes here...

Well, I've been trying to put into the clearest words possible a bit of a personal revelation I had last night.....

Yeah......about what the "war in heaven" was really about. And how I was intimately part of it.

Okay, you know about bicamerality, right? Right and left sides of the brain not integrated, left side experiences impulses from the right side as hallucination, voice of God, etc?

Okay.....well, at the point of human evolution when self-awareness started to emerge--and with it the potential for moral free will--say that the (somewhat) higher intelligences following this course and attempting to *guide* it via those hallucinations-- started to disagree on whether it -- full self-awareness and moral self-determination -- should be *allowed* to develop.

Basically, the emergence of "orthodoxy".....and those adherents gained an ascendency and destroyed--maimed, threw down, tortured, exiled, killed, whatever--the rest of them, particularly those who had been in favour of a necessary balance of "dark" and "light".... Basically breaking the balance. So....by that token demonizing the dark, and at the same time setting it at odds with the light. Starting a war that has not been completed yet, and will be perpetuated so long as one orthodoxy wars against another... There were attempts to heal that balance, but the absolutists -- the "White Angels" I was mentioning the other night -- have always tried to undermine it under the guise of morality and law--the solar values taken to extremes..

(And the steadily-assumed ascendancy of the left brain over the right, with the right's signature traits and associations and 'methods' being demonized by whatever orthodoxy was in power. The "sinister" virtues became marginalized and misunderstood, because the language of metalogic that encompassed them would be considered traitorous to attempt--and still is, and is often handled very badly for this lack of internal balance.)

So basically seems pretty Promethean....the purists wanted to keep humanity "innocently" virtuous, so they ganged up on the rest of us, ripped off our signature parts of anatomy, and threw us off the plane.

When I came out with it...this was originally just from a flash musing on why I always get psychic twinges up the left side of my back....it seemed to suddenly be very logical and familiar. And to give perspective on everything else, even the failures.

I'm thinking it's 'cause they ripped that wing off first, in my case.....kinda gets symbolic there, I guess......

so far as grandiosity goes, I'm the one who was mainly *known* for defending the balance in all things, for being the most circumspect and judicious in dealing with everything, not letting things go to extremes. But then they condemned that as a heresy.

That's where it all gets ultra-personal. And since the reaction against exile made any darkness/deviation get darker and angrier in general, it means that a good deal of the angst and madness and abandon and despair in the world has been the remains of that mass condemnation....

Not because it was originally bad, but because being damned made it seem so.

In short....an extremist view of "good/light" taking a drastic action that, in my observation, created far more evil than there would have been without this concept of trying to limit the moral possibilities of an emerging--and by that token evolving--human self-consciousness.

And then, of course, making up stories of rebellion to cover over the truth and make the "fallen angels" seem even more dark than they ever were. Truth is, "God" as a unified all-powerful and all-knowing entity did not order or sanction this...I think that the total Divinity was still evolving as well, assembling out of the shards of creation. The Watchers (good enough term) were the highest manifested portion of that energy, but not perfect and not all-foreseeing. Moral balance was broken and split, and (rather like the Dark Crystal) it made things go to extremes. Just not exactly the way that all the scriptures say. Which is why every extremism is itself part and parcel and fruit of that act of an absolutist "good" which motivated "evil" in this world.

Um....yeah, tell me if that makes any sense to you.....