Old news, blown over, just leaving the carcasses for the crows...

[These people are basically in the category of "those who speak out their arses"....well, you all know that if you've checked out anything of that somewhat-recent fracas. I had this retortical post nearly complete some time ago when my computer froze up and would not let me type (it's called a hyperactive Murphy driver...:-|). But I'd saved it embedded into another open file, and now needing to clean that one out of all unnecessaries I regurgitate this one forth, expressly for the purposes of final purgation. I do have better things to do, afterall, than waste time with such dedicated and narrowsighted sophists....]

I think that some people have their over-abstractified post-modern heads shoved up their pseudo-existential asses. One person calls me "inexperienced" and "brainwashed" (hardly!) while another tries to argue that I'm denying the existence and survival-necessity of female lying as a defense against memetic brainwashing.......instead of seeing that it's simply the prejudice of all generalized and unbalanced accusation that I'm taking aim at. They think I'm being personally defensive when all I'm defending is simple fairness and accuracy -- impersonally and without ego-investment or paranoia -- and I'm fairly certain that they're too deep into their jargon to give a rat's ass about objectivity of any kind.

Though, I am aware that being balanced the way I am, in a subculturish neck of these cyberwoods, means that I often tend to be too logical and left-brained for some people's comfort, as they are often too right-brained to maintain practical rational principles on their own behaviour and pronouncements of alleged fact. Their judgmentalism, on the other hand, apparently remains unimpaired.......and then there's that condescending assumption that I must somehow be defending illusions, even though the last time I checked, everything I was saying was attempting to loosen some rather vile and conspicuous delusional attitudes that were being vented in my vicinity and onto my friends page.

If someone writes falsely that all of a certain arbitrary group are "liars", is the person who calls her on that lie defending an illusion that people do not lie, asserting that they ought to be allowed to lie without others' taking note, or even denying that some pathological liars do exist? No. He is pointing out the logical fallacy of her statement. It does not take a genius to understand this, so so why are these pretentious and oh-so-esoteric didacticists, who are all so much more wary with their comment-fields and journal entries than I am, ignoring that simple point with every ego-defense that they can muster and calling me the defensive one?

Ah, well it could be 'cause I'm just not even pretending to be polite about it......>:) It's fun to just have at someone and rip their head off. Especially when they're not using it half as constructively as they pretend to be.

So these now are the wankers of my discontent.....because I may be an intellectual and a smartass but I ain't some paranoid self-pity-wallowing asshat crouching in my techno-fortified online bomb shelter of an LJ to guard my fragile eggshell ego from meeting any direct challenge or question while all the time shooting bitter bile at the virtual heavens, trying to strike blind sympathy from those drifting stars that never fully sleep and whose friction can always be pushed away should it start to burn too closely.

In other news... [...] ...How good it is to be happily married.

Well, there's really nothing extraordinarily new that comes to mind, apart from the bitter cold and driven snow that hath descended amongst us.....really, I just wanted to put some distance between myself and that incident that's still referred to in my last post, as I don't particularly want to answer questions or challenges or anything about it....this is the point where I just let nature take its course and forget all about whatever has been too much of a bother and distraction in the first place. It usually has happened with relationships, historically, but applies just as well to Internet drama as to material studied up for tests and units and projects and quarter-courses, which vanishes like melting snow once the needful occasion is done.

The one thing that disturbs me sometimes is how susceptible I am to flattery, and how many people have used praise of my looks, my skills, my creativity, my brain itself to inveigle accommodation of their own demands and ego-hungers. It has taken far too great a toll on my life and energy, to closely-feed people who give me lip-service or tributes (embarrassing but true) to try to win me over. This is a general pattern, though more in effect online than off (afterall, we all are here craving some kind of attention), and it bothers me....especially since I have my perfect union now with Litharriel, and can see all the more clearly the differences between what we have between us in honesty and the manipulation I've encountered with women (and teenage girls, and men who behave like women in unflattering ways...) before and intertwined with this season of actual truth.

Looking over old love letters and their attached detritus reminds me how lucky I am to be where I am, instead of caught somewhere else, with anyone who would not, despite all my rosy-hued self-delusions, be truly "seeing me as I am", "understanding me", or "getting inside my world". Many are called but few are chosen? That does sound a bit harsh, unless of course one recalls in this the other close relationships that I still enjoy as well....indeed, up till the point when it became unavoidable that there was something between the two of us, I had more-or-less decided against seeking my own desire, and in favour of doing what I could to give love/understanding/contact where it was needed by kindred spirits, with a broad and pretty much polyamorous scope to that. I really can't say that that's gone away atall, either, except that I actually do have a wholehearted primary bond as well....a fitting mate, a partner-in-crime, someone who shares all my gutters and helps me with the furnishing thereof.....>:)

Hmm....okay, now I'm wondering in what words (and what language) I may have said these thoughts before, or anything like them.....:-?

Ahwell, back to the trance sessions, eh...?